Monday 21 September 2015

How to get off a bus

Simple you may think but you are mistaken. It is a complex business starting with the look on your face as you belatedly realise you are at your stop. (You can practise this expression at the check out of any supermarket when you suddenly accept that you have to pay for your trolley load.) Rise slowly to your feet and then go through all your possessions to make sure you have everything. Women with handbags are at an advantage here as this process can be spun out for minutes. Move in a leisurely fashion down the aisle chatting to anyone you know not forgetting the driver who likes a little conversation. Step gently off and beam happily at the waiting queue who have been standing in the wind and rain admiring your expertise.